As June is celebrated globally as LGBTQ+ Pride Month to commemorate the 1969 Stonewell riots in New York, the Eastern Cape Voice decided to bring a local LGBTQ activist outlining the lives of “Gays and Lesbians” urging them to come out from their closet and appealing for recognition in particular in those deep remote areas.
Karabo Ngaka who hails from rural Tsoleng in Tlokoeng in the Eastern Cape stressed that before we got into details he/she highlighted that “I use both pronouns because I’m Gender Non-Conforming experience known as GNC”. Nevertheless, in this instance Karabo preferred to use ‘she’ gender. She narrated a story from her tiny age, growing up in rural areas where people lack or no knowledge of LGBTQ+ up until now.
She said, she never had to explain herself to her family or come out as gay because signs were always there. She said according to the people who’ve been part of her upbringing however, it seems all abnormal to everyone in the community and in school including herself as she was still getting into terms with the fact that she was actual different from other pupils but CAPS was introduced as a new syllabus and Life Orientation subjects introduced “Gays & Lesbians” even though it wasn’t a chapter that teachers really loved touching. Karabo stated that most of challenges for gays growing in bundus like her is always having to be trapped in a lifestyle that aren’t yours just to fit in, doing the boy’s stuff like going to the fields herding animals, trying out girls etc but it truly took her not so many years to find herself and learn her new norm. “Being judged, criticized and being told you’re trying to be a woman and that homosexually is demonic is what I still face up to date,” said Ngaka.
Ngaka also highlighted the challenges of being an open gay man as others take advantage of that. “When you’re an openly gay man like myself, curious Heterosexual men tend to take advantage of you just to explore their sexualities or nurse their curiosity ….some will approach you and say they’re Bisexual, most are married men with families …some will come use you for money, some just want to experiment the same gender love hence there are popular terms “After 9s and Gaypay”. After 9s are men who are living double lives, straight during the day and gay at night mostly because they’re scared of coming out. Gaypay is when one dates/sleeps with a gay person in exchange for something,” she revealed. Karabo called on any young or old gay person who’s been scared of coming out to finally speak their truth after years of silence and dread.
She said this month is for them to gather the courage of coming out of the closet, even if it means sacrificing the affection and support of their profound religious family. “This month it’s when we get to embrace the freedom to be oneself and celebrate individuality, Pride means empowerment and solidarity and for me it always reminds me of how much I am lucky to have been able to live my truth in rural areas whereas not everybody in the LGBTQIA+ community has had the life of freedom and love as I have,” she concluded.
Meanwhile, Karabo is also known on the stage and on air as Aunticle and a co-host the Big Breakfast Show every Monday-Friday in the Alfred Nzo Community Radio based at EmaXesibeni. He also hosts the choral music show every Sunday at 15h00 to 18h00.
